The Mystery Bag Unvieled

My husband, and most men I know, are terrified of purses.  I think most women can sympathize with this.  Tonight we were at Gander Mountain, shopping for ice fishing jigs, of all things.  Apparently at the end of the season, they have a big sale, just like they do with bikinis in August.  Who knew.  So with a cart loaded down with kids, we spent a good hour and a half looking at jigs. 

Toward the end of this jaunt, Luna (2 months) got very crabby and fussy.  Bored, breastfed and hungry, I figured.   I did what any desperate Gander Mountain Mommy would do as her spouse perused the jigs.  I thrust my purse at him and said "I'm taking the baby to the bathroom."  He looked at my purse like it was radioactive cat poo, but took it.  And put it in the cart with a 2 year old and a 3 year old.  I gave him THE LOOK  that says "You moron!" and said "I would just hold it if I were you."

What is the aversion to purses ?  Mine is a harmless little hot pink Michael Kors number.  I think we should de-mystify the woman's purse as mine was de-mistified in Gander Mountain.  Yeah, since Mister Cool refused to hold it and let the kids have their way with it, the contents got dumped in the cart, and when he didn't notice that and pushed the cart through the fishing lure aisles, the contents left a trail of my personal effects.

Here goes:  1. Wallet, checkbook, and contents.  Boring, yes.  But necessary.
2.  Diapers.  2 size 5, 2 size 1.  wipes.  Again, necessary evils when little ones abound.
3.  one purell hand sanitizing wipe
4.  one Saf-t-pop sucker.  Green.  For use only in emergency.
5.  lip balm.  melon flavor.
6.  Luna bar, peppermint.  Again for emergency use only.

Now, to the really embarassing items (at least I assume, for a man):
1.  one tube lanolin.  good for cracked and bleeding nipples.
2.  two nursing pads, individually wrapped.
3.  one tampon, regular absorbency.

That's all.  That's it.  Sorry guys, we don't keep the secrets of our universe in there.  And as far as I can tell, there is nothing radioactive in our purses.  So seriously, when we have to make an emergency trip to the bathroom and ask you to hold it, don't abandon it in the cart with little kids who get great joy in sprinkling the contents about.  Maybe hot pink isn't the epitome of masculinity, but its usually not great lengths of time that we ask you to keep track of our purses.  No big deal. Just hold it.  They don't bite.  And its a lot less shameful than having to collect the above mentioned contents from the floors of Gander Mountain.